If you've been in the position, you'll likely agree that a break up is not very easy to deal with, right? Even if you're the person who has called it off, you will likely feel some amount of emptiness at the end of it all. What you need to know is how to get over a break up so it doesn't continue to control your thoughts and worse your moods!Give yourself time. It’s OK to give yourself a set period to mourn the end of a relationship. Hey, you invested a ton of time and emotions in the relationship, and we know you cared about your ex. You have two days to burrow under the covers, eat ice cream out of the carton and watch bad day-time TV. Then snap out of it.
Cut him out. Throw out his sweatshirt, those photos of you, unfriend him on Facebook, and delete his number. No matter what he says, you need the time and space. Perhaps you can be friends later on, but right now, remove anything that will bring back those memories.
Express yourself. If you play guitar, paint, or write, use that creative outlet and express yourself. Bottled up emotions don’t do any good, and not only is art therapeutic, but on the plus side lots of artists do their best work during stressful periods.
Keep busy. Throw yourself into your work to keep your mind focused. Try all of those things that you didn’t have time for when you were a couple. Hit the gym for some feel-good endorphins. Not only will you be distracted, but the feeling of accomplishment is a certain mood lifter.Rely on your friends. One mantra to live by: boys come and go but good girl friends (or guy friends) are there forever. Hang out and connect with your support network, talk it over and let them lend a shoulder.
Don’t make the same mistakes. Life is a learning process, and while it might be tempting to dwell on this relationship, realize that obviously something wasn’t working. It might be as simple as “he just wasn’t that into you” but realize it, learn from it, and move on.
Do not be a crazy ex. The media does not need more fodder. Do not contact him, do not spread rumors, do not have meltdowns in public, do not slash his tires and do not trash him to anyone except your closest friends. As hard as it might be, try to handle a breakup with class and grace, and the rumor mill will be saying “he’s such a scumbag for dumping her” as opposed to “god, I’m glad he got away from that psycho”.
Get back out there. Dive back into that social scene with a girl’s night out, not as a desperate hunt for a replacement (how unladylike), but for a fun night and to flaunt your new singledom. Go to the gym, get your haircut, and get your nails done. Put on a sassy dress and flirt with that cute waiter. Just as a bonus, nothing says revenge like coming out of a break-up smarter, sexier, more accomplished and more confident.
As much as we wish that dating were easy, it isn’t. It takes a lot of time to go through the bad ones before you find a keeper. So as one of my dear girl friends says, “shoulders back, boobs up and lipstick on…. it can only get better from here.”
